An Honest Review of Queen’s University

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So after four long years, I, our humble ex-ex-editor, will be leaving both Golden Words and Queen’s University.

[hold for crying from reader]

Other than tossing and turning late at night in a pool of my own sweat fearing graduation and adult life, I have been thinking about my experiences at Queen’s (Sha Gael!). In this article I will be discussing the good, the bad, and the ugly that is Queen’s University. I expect to be leaving within a month, but there is always the hope that I have in fact been accepted to Queen’s Medicine despite my 1.3 GPA, not having written the MCATs and a rejection letter from Queen’s Medicine saying ‘you’re just not our type’. The dean of admissions from Queen’s Meds and I still grab coffee every now and then. She tells me about how the relationship with her students is going. We’re friends. But at any rate, here is a small list of my honest experiences at Queen’s and a review of my experience here as a whole.

REPUTATION

Queen’s has the highest reputation for education and research. Times Higher Education ranks Queen’s at 251-275 for best universities in the world. That’s only 125 places below the University of Florida! With such a high reputation, it’s only expected that the workload would be rigorous and demanding. And it was. I had to bust my ass here. There would be weeks at a time where I wouldn’t even go out on Thursdays… And there were other days where I would have to get up as early as 11am to go to class. It was all worth it though. With my education at Queen’s, I was able to get into the marketing and communications program at Humber, which has been my dream since grade school.

STUDENTS

Queen’s attracts a certain type of hard working, sociable, and cultured student body. Otherwise referred to as a ‘fucking tryhards’. If you are looking for a school where you can pad your resume thicker than Charmin’s ultra soft, Queen’s is the school for you. Queen’s has more clubs than any other school in Canada. However, most of them are a facade for staying in a hotel for a weekend and getting hammered while pretending to care about 3rd world development. Unfortunately, the double edged sword of the amount of clubs on campus is that there is a constant supply of people begging you for money in the ARC and JDUC. There is a goddamn bake sale every day of the year. I don’t even understand how they’re profitable. Minimum 5 cent donation? If you insist…

Queen’s students are usually pigeonholed as being all snobby, rich, arrogant, spoiled brats. That’s only half true. Sure, we’re all spoiled and rich, but we make up for being snobby and arrogant by constantly checking our privilege and posting self-righteous rants to Overheard and Yik Yak. The student life center has even set up privilege check stations where you can check yours, or a friends, privilege on campus before going to class. The worst part about the student body at Queen’s is that it consists of people like that one douchebag you know who was at that party last weekend chugging out of a beer bong who will probably go on to be a company board member or MP. Actually, nevermind I take it back, that sounds awesome. It also leads in nicely into my next topic.

NIGHTLIFE

For every one reclusive shut-in at Queen’s, there are about five others that have been going out for a week straight and can get you some pretty sweet MDMA. It’s a well known fact, Queen’s is a party school. Hell, we partied so hard one year, our principal had to ban partying all together for 5 years afterwards. It’s been fun, I’m not gonna lie. Queen’s students party so hard the profs have to hold annual ‘beers/wine with profs’ just so they can trick their students into meeting them. At Queen’s, everyone believes that these are legitimately the best years of their lives, so they overcompensate by drinking 5 nights out of the week and call it ‘making memories’. When life ends at graduation, you might as well take your rage out on your liver after all.

OVERALL RATING

8/10, would attend again – and probably will have to in order to get enough credits to graduate.

On a serious note, I’ve spent all 4 years at university writing for Golden Words and it’s been rad. I was so nervous coming in my first week, but I have never regretted it. I implore anyone interested in comedy or writing in general to come out on Sundays. If I have only made one person exhale wind from their nose while reading an article or graphic of mine, then I haven’t really done my job. But that’s okay – I got free food out of it anyways. It’ll be weird not coming back in September to write for the good ol’ GW but I am confident that someone better and more competent will take my place. Horvat out.

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