Did I scare you? No? Well, that’s ok, yelling boo isn’t really an effective way to scare people. Really this whole holiday is a goddamn waste of time. Ya, I said it: Halloween sucks.
No wait, come back!
I am being serious though. Most of this scorn revolves around the cost…BOO! Got you then, didn’t I? Still no? Man, you’re really bumming me out, reader. 
Back on topic, I am being serious though. Most of this scorn revolves around the costumes. And not even the costumes themselves – a lot of them can be super creative and very clear they put a lot of effort into them. What I hate is the process of
finding a costume. It is such a waste of time and creativity.
Plu, it just adds increased anxiety to the shopping experience. Maybe it’s just me, but shopping (especially for clothing) is such a shitty experience. There’s so much pressure to buy things! Add in the fact that it’s two days before Halloween, which means a) The store is packed; and b)everyone in there is working on a super creative costume that’s better than yours; and it just turns into a nightmare.
I’d also like to take this opportunity to say “Fuck Phase Two!” Seriously, I’ve never been more disappointed by a store in my life. They must call it Phase 2 because it’s 2x as expensive as Value Village, a golden institution.  I was looking for jeans with the express purpose of cutting them into jorts: $17.99 at Phase 2. Value Village? $5.99. I rest my case.
When you’re a student and you don’t have a car, finding all the stuff for your homemade costume can take an extremely long time, because nothing is ever in one location. Case in point: it took me THREE HOURS to make a trip to WALMART. Do you know where the Kingston Walmart is? I took the bus to the Cat Centre and walked to the Rio Can Centre, where I assumed it was. IT WAS NOT. It was FURTHER NORTH than the Cat Centre. And this, the store that advertises itself as having EVERYTHING, didn’t have two of the things I needed. Fuck you, Walmart! And fuck you, poor urban design in the northwest area of Kingston! No man can walk that.
While I can appreciate the effort of some costumes, otherwise the holiday seems an excuse to show some skin. Which is fine. Its just if you’re gonna put a lack of effort (ie cat ears and a busty dress), you might as well just not wear a costume and just wear something sexy. Seriously, no one will care. Everyone is drinking and either wanting to have sex or trying their very hardest to not cheat on their boyfriend/girlfriend. This mainly applies to women, but if it applies to a guy in your life, by all means pass this advice onto him.
And once you get to the Halloween parties, there is literally nothing special about them besides the fact that everyone is dressed ridiculously. Like, more ridiculously than usual, because Urban Outfitters. Its not like I had a shitty time at Halloween, but man is there a lot of hype that it never lives up to. All I got out of it was $80 worth of garbage on my bedroom floor.
Well except for the jorts – those are gonna get some use.
EBOLA! There, that scared you, right? Damnm Straight.