Local Guy Invites Woman Over to Actually Watch a Movie

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Earlier this week, local student George Reeves invited a woman he is well acquainted with to watch a movie. Unlike many guys however, he seriously only wanted to watch a movie, causing much confusion. “This girI I know told me she had never seen ‘The Matrix’! How crazy is that? It’s a classic that’s been out for more than a decade. I told her she should come over to watch it. So I brought her up to my room to show her what she’s been missing her whole life.” Sources say that he didn’t even try the classic yawn and reach, leaving his friend, another student named Karissa Stone, confused and upset.
“When I told my housemates that I was going over to a guy’s house to watch a movie, they were saying things like ‘Ou, you know what that means!’ and I just laughed it off and denied it. Obviously I know what ‘that’ means. Everyone knows what that means…. I thought I was gonna ride the train into bangtown, but he just kept looking at me to gage my reaction when something ‘totally awesome’ happened on screen.” George seemed to be completely oblivious to Karissa’s intentions. “There was a good thirty minutes where Karissa was just staring at me, smiling.” George explains “I kept on telling her to stop looking at me and watch the movie. It’s weird, it’s as if she wasn’t interested in actually watching the movie at all.”
George’s housemates were not impressed with him to say the least. “That guy may actually be the stupidest friend I’ve ever had. We were all hanging out when this girl came in. She was really cute too. George says something like, ‘wanna go up to my room to watch it?’ She smiles and agrees. We all started to make jokes about how loud she would be. At first we just thought she was really quiet, but when we asked what happened, George just said ‘Neo flew at the end like always. That part has always pissed me off.’ We just stared at him blank faced.” When asked about it, George denied any sort of sexuality in the situation.
“You think she wanted to have sex? What?…. I mean, huh… that would explain- Oh God I’m such an idiot.” George now says that he has learned from his misjudgment and that from now on when he invites a girl over to watch a movie, there will be nothing but good old fashioned intercourse with very little actual movie watching.  

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