MAKE QUEEN’S GREAT AGAIN

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The following transcript is from a speech delivered by Donald Trump to the Young Republicans of Kingston Organisation.
Hello students. Let me just say that I love Queen’s. It’s a great place. One of the greatest places in the world.  I know because I’ve been there. In fact I am standing here right now.
I love Queen’s so much that I was shocked when I learned something terrible about this University. My friends, they came to me and they said, ‘Donald, did you know that Queen’s University doesn’t have a President?’ I couldn’t believe it. I was shocked. Shocked! All the best things have presidents. The United States of America, Fortune 500 companies, the Trump Organization. Everything that matters has a president. You know what Queen’s has? A principal: Principal Woolf.  Principals aren’t qualified to lead universities. We have a guy who should be managing a middle school in charge of everything around here. Principal Woolf isn’t good enough to be a president. What makes Woolf think he can satisfy Queen’s? The guy can’t even spell ‘Wolf’ right.
An extremely credible source has called my office and told me that Principal Woolf’s birth certificate is a fraud. Wikipedia says Woolf was born in London. London what? London, England? London, Ontario? London, Ohio? I don’t know, my staffer didn’t read the rest of the article to me out loud. If we don’t know where you were born, you cannot be president. You should not even be a principal. There is a real question. You know what I get a kick out of? The mayor of London says, ‘I remember when he was born 50 years ago.’ I doubt it. I think this guy should be investigated. He remembers when Woolf was born? Give me a break! He is having a hard time — he spent millions of dollars trying to get away from this issue, millions of dollars in legal fees trying to get away from this issue. And I’ll tell you what, I brought it up just routinely and all of a sudden, a lot of facts are emerging, and I’m starting to wonder myself whether or not Principal Woolf was born at all.
Quite simply, it is time to bring real leadership to Kingston. The fact is, the university dream is dead – but if I win, I will bring it back bigger and better and stronger than ever before. Together, we will make Queen’s great again!
The line of ‘make Queen’s great again’, the phrase, that was mine. I came up with it about a year ago, and I kept using it, and everybody’s using it. They are all loving it. I don’t know, I guess I should copyright it. Maybe I have copyrighted it.
Why will I be a good president? Because I am a businessman, a really good businessman. There are stupid people that say, ‘oh didn’t Trump declare bankruptcy? Didn’t he go bankrupt?’ I didn’t go bankrupt! Queen’s needs a businessman as president because jobs are really bad right now. There aren’t enough jobs for everyone. We are losing jobs because China is beating us in trade.
Free trade is terrible. Free trade can be wonderful if you have smart people. But we have stupid people. I love China because they have smart people, but they are beating us. China has bridges that make the bridge from the JDUC to the ARC look like small potatoes. You know what? The bridge from the JDUC to the ARC doesn’t even exist. We should make it exist and it would create jobs.
When was the last time anybody saw us beating China in a trade deal? They kill us. I beat China all the time! All the time! When did we beat them at anything? They send their foreign exchange students over here by the millions, and what do we do? When was the last time you saw a Queen’s student in China? It doesn’t exist, folks!
I will be the greatest jobs president God ever created. I will create so many jobs that everyone will have a job when they graduate. There will be jobs for every person. We need a president who can create jobs and we need a president that wrote ‘the art of the deal’. I wrote ‘the art of the deal’. I am great at making deals.
You know who isn’t great at making deals? The people who run Queen’s. Thirty million dollars they spent on a website! Solus, it’s a thirty million dollar website, and to this day it doesn’t work. A thirty million dollar website! I have so many websites, I have them all over the place. I hire people, they do a website, it costs me three dollars. Thirty. Million. Dollar. Website. Unbelievable!
Let me talk about these other people, they call themselves ‘Divest Queen’s’. They want us to sell all our stocks in the oil companies because they want to stop this thing they call ‘global warming’. Last week it was cold. It snowed. In fact, it snowed a lot. Studio Q news just called it ‘the great freeze’ – coldest weather in years. Is our University still spending money on the GLOBAL WARMING HOAX?
I am a businessman, I make great business deals – It’s what I do for a living. I know that we need to buy, buy when it’s low sell when it’s high. Right now is a good time to buy. We need to come together and double down, maybe even triple down on our oil stocks. That’s how you earn yacht money, helicopter money. Wouldn’t that be wonderful? If we could get everyone at Queen’s a helicopter? But they won’t let me. The board of directors won’t let me invest the whole endowment in oil. They have no vision, absolutely no vision. I have vision. That’s why I have helicopters, multiple helicopters, and the board of directors hasn’t given you even one helicopter.
Queens has a lot of tradition. I love tradition. There is over 150 years of tradition at Queen’s and I think it is great. Tradition is what makes Queen’s wonderful. I have so many fabulous friends who happen to be gay, but I am a traditionalist.
When you start changing traditions, that’s when things go downhill, and it’s happening at Queen’s. Every year, these leaders, they keep changing the traditions – making them go away, and it is having an effect, a really really bad effect. Queen’s used to be a small university, a really small university. Only the best could get in, and you had to apply and there were only spots for the best. I know because I’m smart. My IQ is one of the highest and you all know it. Please don’t feel so stupid or insecure; it’s not your fault.
These days they are letting in lots of people, too many people. We are not turning enough people away. We are accepting so many people we had to build new residences to put all these people in. They have new buildings on main campus, but at least those buildings are nice. They are really nice. Believe me, I know buildings, buildings are what I am good at. I am the number one builder in Manhattan.  You know what buildings are not nice? West Campus. All of it. Everything on West Campus is not nice. They built all these ugly not nice buildings to house the second rate people that are getting into this university. I have seen the pictures, they are slums. We have hundreds, maybe thousands of people living close together and they all have the same language and ideas and they don’t mix well with the rest of the population. When 9/11 happened there were people that were cheering on the other side of West Campus. They were cheering as the World Trade Center came down.
We need to be careful. This happened at St. Lawrence College, and it became so dangerous that the police don’t even go there. There is a no go zone that campus security won’t even respond to because they fear for their lives.
When West Campus sends its people, they’re not sending the best. They’re sending people that have lots of problems and they’re bringing those problems. They’re bringing drugs. They’re bringing crime. They’re rapists. And some, I assume, are good people. But I speak to bus drivers and they’re telling us what we’re getting.
We have to have a wall. We have to have a border. And in that wall we’re going to have a big fat door where people can come into the main campus. But they have to come in legally. I will build a great wall and nobody builds walls better than me, believe me, and I’ll build them very inexpensively. I will build a great, great wall on our western border and I will make West Campus pay for that wall. Mark my words.
Some people say to me that there are West Campus people living among us already. Maybe some of them didn’t like it on West Campus, and transferred here legally. Some of them maybe came here and started dating someone on main campus, and had an anchor baby, and are living here full time. Some of these people can vote. People ask me, ‘Donald, are you worried about not getting the West Campus vote?’ let me tell you, I have a great relationship with the blacks, and the minorities and with the West Campus people. These people love me. I am 100% confident I will win the Latino vote, and I will win the West Campus vote.  
 I am a really rich guy, I am a billionaire. I have over 8 billion dollars. Even though I am a billionaire, I am not like most other billionaires. I identify most with students. I have a lot in common with students, like social media, I am great at social media. My twitter is so powerful that I can actually make my enemies tell the truth.
Another social media that the Queen’s students like to use is Tinder. Queen’s students are very good at Tinder because you are all attractive, very attractive compared to other universities. The beauty of me is that I’m very rich. I am and rich and successful and an attractive person. All the women in the AMS have flirted with me consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected. My fingers are long and beautiful, as, it has been well documented, are various other parts of my body. I like to surround myself with attractive people and Queen’s students are very attractive. My daughter Ivanka also has a very nice figure. I’ve said if Ivanka weren’t my daughter, perhaps I’d be dating her.
You know why else I understand students? Loans. Students these days take lots of loans, sometimes twenty thousand, forty thousand dollar loans, maybe more. You know I started off in Brooklyn. My father gave me a small loan of one million dollars. I came into Manhattan, and I had to pay him back, and I had to pay him back with interest. It has not been easy for me. If I can be successful, you can also.
I have lots of support, tremendous support at Queen’s. Thousands of people support me. My people are so smart, and you know what else they say about my people? The polls, they say I have the most loyal people, did you ever see that? I could stand in the middle of University Avenue and shoot somebody, and I wouldn’t even lose any voters. Okay? It’s like, incredible!
They say Trump’s voters are by far the most loyal, you know I am polling at 68, 69 percent, I am at 90% total. When you change the question from ‘will you say absolutely yes’ to ‘will you most likely say yes’ that gets it to the nineties. Other guys are at, like, ten. That is absolutely unheard of. A guy like Jon Wiseman, he isn’t nobody but he’s not like nothing, he doesn’t have people. Julie Tsung: soft, they’re all soft. They won’t be president, and they shouldn’t be president. I will be president and I will be the best president this University has ever seen! I will make Queen’s great again!
Send Donald Trump a shoutout on Twitter at 
@realDonaldTrump #makequeensgreatagain or ask Principal Woolf about his birth certificate at
@queensprincipal #birther
 

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