So You’ve Been Turkey Dumped


As thanksgiving comes to a close, many of us are trudging back to school newly single. Whether you dumped the turkey, or were the turkey that dun got dumped, you find yourself feeling a new kind of liberation. You can now go on a quest for a new turkey, ah, human. Sometimes relations don’t work out, shut happens, and the best time to end them is seconds before you can probably get away with never seeing them again. We here at Golden Word decided to create a list of the most popular, the most outrageous, and the most heartbreaking things people said as a part of their Turkey Dump.
“I’m not trying to ruffle any feathers here, I just don’t see a future for us.”
“This is going to be hard to swallow, but I think we need to be just friends. Someone else has wormed their way into my life.”
“We weren’t good together. If I stayed with you I would only be robin’ you of your future.”
“I’m only trying to sparrow you a lot of pain in the future.” 
“You just aren’t tweeting me like I feel I should be tweeted. And you get up way too early, which is fine, but you don’t have to yell at me until I get up too.” 
“This is really hawkward for me to say, but it’s over between us. I don’t love you anymore.” 
“Our time together has been eggcellent, and wren I think about you I want to remeber it that way.”
“I’ve really been thinking about us, and I think we need a beak, uh, break. I want to take a break.” 
“To be entirely truthful I find you, and this entire relationship, just fowl. Anytime you want to have sex you just run around in a circle and squawk at me, it’s weird.”
“You are literally a turkey, and dating a turkey just isn’t cool anymore. I’ve moved onto this Pumpkin Spice Latte.”