St. Paddy’s Day, a Poem

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From Queen’s there were many students

Who thought “well our classes have screwed us”

Here are their tales

Of St. Paddy’s Day’s ales

Where their morals were also the loosest…

 

There once was a student in Eng

Who decided to go on a bend

Replaced purple with green

And caused quite a scene

‘Cause for two days, the school was Ireland

 

The Nurses, at the Engs they gazed

But put up with them all through the haze

Because free drinks they got

For being so hot

And then after they may have got laid…

 

The ArtScis began the day early

And looked ‘round for a Phe, big and burly

Did they have fun,

Stroking his bun?

Who knows? They were smashed by 10:30

 

The PheKins themselves, they were busy

Playing hurley, and eating their pizzi,

They left Paddy’s early

To go and have an orgy

Well, who is surprised, they’re all pretty

 

Commies were alerted to the fact

That leprechaun gold is an act

But nevertheless

They went to excess

By collecting it all day, the rats

 

Someone noticed the lack of CompSci

No one knew that they’d stayed inside

Creative juices: they flowed

While working on code

Well at least they won’t get denied

 

Who’s that in the corner, I see

All the Music kids, sing’n “do mi”

Drinking and blowing

Fingering and tonguing

All five make a merry party

 

Fine Art tried to sculpt a big shamrock

But in the end it just looked like a cock

Their logic for making these

Was brimming with fallacies

And their profs, they all died of shock

 

At last there were the Con-Eds

In the morning they felt very dead

You thought they were drinking?

What were you thinking?

They were putting the others to bed!

 

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