Things That Are Savage


The phrase “Savage” is often thrown around. It seems as if any mundane act is described as the pure barbarism that the word savage implies. Golden Words is here to definitely tell you the things that are Savage:


Peeing on children, then getting mad at their parents for trying to stop you

Eating Ceviche while pregnant

Saying you’re 21 on tinder when you’re really 20

Leaving the toilet seat up in a bar bathroom

Taking a snapchat video while zooming in on someone’s face

Wearing a sweatshirt for a college you don’t go to

Taking nyquil even though you don’t have a cold

Having a bible verse in your twitter bio even though you’ve been to church twice

Filling up on bread before the entree comes out

That guy from Mythbusters

Ordering a full sized Caesar salad at a restaurant and tipping 13%

Being Seth Rogen

Eating a tomato like a handfruit

Using the ideal gas law even though you are dealing with conditions in which it does not apply

Not knowing the words to Hotline Bling

Cooking too much rice because you don’t understand the cooking ratio

Only reading the Sparknotes summary of books for a book report

Pretending to like Jazz to seem cultured

Correcting someone’s cutlery form

Blogging about white privilege

People who say they aren’t excited about Adele’s new album

Building a condominium on top of an ancient Indian graveyard

Going to the club just to dance with your girls

Using the express line when you have 12 items or more

Liking profile pictures before 2012

Chasing alcohol with an apple

Hyphenating your children’s names

Pretending not to know the lyrics to Spice Girls’ Wannabe

Asking someone to help fix your internet because they’re in Eng

Asking someone not to spoil a show that’s been out for 5 years

Commenting on political Facebook posts

The preceding items are the only things that are savage. Nothing else is savage. Claiming something not on this list is savage is probably the most savage thing you can do.